Why Monogamy Is Still Important In The Era Of Hookups

For many years, monogamy has always been considered as a valued aspect of any relationship. Socially, it is generally seen as the only truly widely accepted relationship structure, with people causing quite a stir when they stray away from home.

Yet, in recent years, the idea of open relationships has hit the headlines, with celebrities such as Scarlett Johansson advocating the notion of devoting yourself to multiple partners.

In fact, a 2015 study conducted by Twoo, found that 48 percent of men and 30 per cent of women were quite intrigued by the concept of having an open relationship. That is, seeing other people while in a long-term relationship.

Perhaps much of the attraction stems from the enticement induced by jealousy, with 33 per cent of men and women agreeing that the green-eyed monster is a healthy trait for couples to have when in a relationship. Perhaps it’s the spice that keeps things alive?

The gamification of dating

Perhaps one of the biggest culprits for the apparent decline in monogamy is the recent trend towards dating gamification. Smartphone apps, such as Tinder, have made looking for love nothing more than a careless pastime. What’s more, it’s usually used as a boredom buster, as millions of young adults sign in each day when they’ve simply nothing better to do. Is this really the right approach to meeting a match?

In fact, Tinder sees a gobsmacking 1.4 billion swipes skim across screens each and every day. Across the world, on average, this equates to 24 million daily Tinder matches.

With so many singles and so much interest at your fingertips, the argument is that dating has just become too easy. Instant results are expected, little work is put into the initial encounters. In the case that sparks don’t fly straight away, both men and women are moving onto their next match. Nothing lost, but nothing gained either. And when they do find the one, it seems that signing out isn’t a priority – only 54 per cent of Tinder users are single, with 12 per cent in an active relationship.

Sadly, Tinder use really does encapsulate the culture of contemporary dating. This is also the case for naughty dating sites like sexwithnostrings.com/casual-dating; but at least this sort of site is honest about its purpose. It’s just people looking for fun so at least they’re not lying about wanting to be in a relationship.

Long-term relationship goals

Yet, while going on multiple dates, meeting myriad men and women, flirting around and playing the dating game is on the rise, it isn’t necessarily what people want long term.

Perhaps the rise of social media, apps, and online dating sites, is merely providing singles with an opportunity to sift through mismatches. Perhaps rather than ditching monogamy entirely, millennials are purely on a search for the one. Perhaps having fun, meeting new people, and moving on, is just a way to get to know what you want from a relationship.

Monogamy may not be a pressing priority for young singles today, but it certainly isn’t slipping out of fashion. The up-and-coming generation of newlyweds are simply shopping around before they settle down. Surely that’s nothing but a good thing?